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"I’m aware my age is an issue for you,” Annaleah continued, " but I promise you, it won’t be an issue in regards to my intellectual abilities or in my ability to teach this class. I’m not here to take over, and I won’t attempt to teach your subjects, I know you’re much more skilled there than I am. I’m just here to introduce occultism, mysticism and superstitions found throughout the world. I hope that we can work together to teach the class to benefit the students.” She held her gaze meeting Sebastian's, strength exuding from her heart, even if she was trembling on the inside.
"By all means, Ms.... excuse me, Annaleah," Sebastian said, all but purring at her in what seemed to be a mocking way. "I am sure we will be able to come to an agreement as to our teaching styles and how to best proceed with this arrangement. I have already finalized my curriculum for the first semester, but I will find a way to include your areas of expertise."
Chancellor Tanner cleared her throat. "Well then," she spoke, her voice light, "Annaleah and Sebastian, I will see you both on Monday on the first day of school. I hope both of you enjoy your weekend."
Chapter Four
Ruminations
Saturday, August 6th
Annaleah’s hiding something. It’s driving me mad that I can’t immediately see into her deception; knowing things of this manner is something which I pride myself in, even if I don’t make it widely known. It's in their micro expressions, in the temperature of their skin, in the way they hold themselves. Her secret however, eludes me. It was more like something I could sense in her aura, some great wall built up to protect something important. But what? It’s put me on guard against her, despite her overall essence of innocence. I’m not used to putting my guard up against anyone; I am rather used to it being the other way around.
I don’t trust her, but she intrigues me. How is it that she can maintain a sense of wide-eyed wonder and innocence, and yet exude something powerfully secret, the likes of which even I cannot penetrate? She is a nervous little creature, too. She walked into Gladys's office as if she had all the confidence in the world. Does she think I failed to see how she trembled when she looked at me, just like all the others of her sort, no doubt judging me on first sight with no cause yet for doing so? Did she think I missed the catch of breath in her throat, or how her body shook when she attempted to speak to me as an equal? Would she think someone such as myself unable to find out her secret?
It also disturbs me enormously that I was caught off guard by her beauty. What do I care of the ephemeral allure of any human, no matter how great that beauty might be? I’m not of their kind, and it’s never been a problem for me to be distracted by something so petty and unimportant. Still, her emerald green eyes flash across my mind, and I am left wondering if there is something wrong with me. How can I let myself be beguiled so easily? It makes me trust her even less.
I’m still shocked at Chancellor Tanner's decision to add her to my class, especially without asking me or even warning me that it was a possibility. Perhaps this is an indirect means to usurp me?
They respect me, they fear me, and yes, they judge me. They assume they know me, who and what I am. That they come to false conclusions and judgment towards me, infuriates me! I suffer their glances, I feel the weight of their disdain, and then they wonder why I won’t suffer their company. Fools. It sometimes angers me to the point of contempt, then I find relief in imagining terrible fates upon them.
Alas, I am more civilized than they give me credit for. I have already suffered for my indignities back when I was...younger. I won’t make the same mistakes again. But this anger, it flares in my soul and will not let my mind know peace, nor quiet. Do they not know the authority of this subject that I possess? Can they not fathom in their tiny minds just how extensive my knowledge might be? Don’t they realize that, if the self-entitled, little bratty students could sit still for a moment and listen to what I teach, that they might learn enough to pass the course?
I cannot imagine such a life as theirs; to have all the things they need handed to them without striving for it. If they would pay attention for just a moment, they might actually find this learning pleasurable. Otherwise, what is the point of learning, truly, if it does not illuminate your spirit?
To think that my teaching is causing a decrease in students passing my class, that it’s somehow my doing, is unforgivable. If these flesh beasts had just a tiny inkling of what they are truly dealing with! I’m smarter than to entertain the idea of enlightening them, but that I should suffer for a mistake I have not made, is an affront to all that I am. They ought to thank me for my distinguished civility! Instead, they insult me with a child, to teach that which I know better than they could ever hope to understand.
If this is a test of some sort, then I will pass. I resent it with every fiber of my existence, but I shall suffer it. I have suffered far worse, for far longer. It is true that suffering can add sheen to your soul, even if the only one to see it is yourself. Ha! If the other faculty and students saw the sheen I possess, they would die of shock. No one knows of it but me, and it will remain that way, as it always has.
As for Annaleah, I will not tear into her as I had initially wanted. Her innocence and her secret interest me. At least she is a respite from the intolerable monotony my life has become.
~SB~
Chapter Five
Courage
"So," asked Seth from across the diner's shabby little table, "was he as terrible as the Chancellor said he’d be?"
Annaleah shifted in her seat and took a menu from beside the napkin holder. "I don't know about terrible, but he certainly is intimidating. There's something...." Annaleah paused, searching for the right word, and shook her head as it eluded her. An image of his handsome face flickered across mind, and she felt herself blush. Even as cold as he had seemed to be, aloof and intimidating, every so often her mind would drift to him, thinking of the plush velvet of his lips, or the deep inky depths of his dark eyes.
Seth smiled and cocked his head slightly, looking at her as though he sensed the inner workings of her mind, but he said nothing.
"There’s something different about him.” Annaleah continued. I can't put my finger on it. I did hear them talking outside the door before I got there, and I know he’s far from pleased with having me teach with him." She sighed, regarding the menu without interest. Laying it aside, she rubbed at her eyes wearily.
“You look more tired than usual,” Seth told her. “You okay?”
Annaleah nodded slowly, “Yes, I’m alright. I wanted to tell you though, I had a nightmare last night. I just hope it isn’t the start of another pattern.”
Annaleah thought she saw a strange light pass through Seth’s eyes, a flicker of intense blue that was over as quickly as it had come. She blinked in confusion, not sure if what she had seen was real, or if it was a product of her sleepy, over worked mind.
“What kind of nightmare?” he asked her, his voice heavy with concern.
“Well, not a very pleasant one, that’s for sure.” She said, trying to think of how to describe the creature from last night, then deciding against it. “Let’s not worry over it for now, though. I’m sure it was an isolated incident. I’m more worried now about how I am going to handle my new job.” Annaleah grabbed the salt shaker and began to turn it this way and that, fiddling absent mindedly.
“I need this, Seth,” she said, looking at the salt shaker. “With Uncle John's hours being cut and his ill health, I need to help out at home as much as I can. I owe him so much.”
Seth took her hand gently. "You aren't going to let your uncle down, no matter what you do," he said with compassion. "Don't let this Bainbridge dude get you down. You have excellent credentials and he should be honored to have you teach beside him.” Seth leaned over and placed his hand over hers. Annaleah set the salt shaker in its place on the table and grabbed both of his hands with hers.
“You're smart, educated and beautiful,” Seth continued, “What man wouldn't want that?"
Annaleah smiled at her friend, and squeezed his hand. "You always know what to say, don't you, Seth? The truth is, I think he feels like I am trying to pirate his class from him. That's a bad place for us to start.” Annaleah looked towards the window and sighed, her eyes sheening over.
“I don't want the students to see contention between us,” she said quietly. “It might disrupt their learning.”
Seth lifted a blonde eyebrow at her. "Disrupt their learning? You're such a saint, never thinking of yourself and always putting other's needs before your own." Annaleah turned to him, smiling. His teasing was all in good fun, and it cheered her up instantly. She saw the glint in his eye and wry smile, and couldn’t help but smile with him.
He withdrew his hands from hers and placed both of his hands together, pointing his blue eyes up at the ceiling, as if in prayer. "Saint Annaleah of Doltree Georgia, we are blessed this day by your presence." He laughed his melodic laugh, and taking his straw off the table, he opened the end of it, placed it to his mouth and blew the wrapper across the table at her. With a mock look of hurt surprise, she feigned a wound where it had hit her on the shoulder.
"Medic! Medic! I am wounded and in need of medical care!" They were still giggling when the waitress arrived to take their order.
"So, why don't you look this guy up? He stays at an apartment on the university campus, right?” Seth’s eyes suddenly went more serious, his expression showing concern for her situation.
“I bet Chancellor Tanner would tell you how to find him,” he continued, “Set up a meeting and try to get on the same page before you have your first class together, which is what, tomorrow? Make peace with him. Heck, I'll even go with you if you want."
Annaleah tilted her head slightly, thinking about Seth’s suggestion.
"That's not a bad idea, Seth. I sure could use your support. The Professor is quite an intimidating man.”
“Well, that settles it then,” Seth said, perking up at the idea, “I’m coming with you.”
Still in deep thought, Annaleah paused, trying to decide what to do. Should she even do this at all?
After a few more seconds of deep thought, Annaleah looked Seth in the eye, trying to convince herself this was a good idea, one that empowered her and would show the Professor she was stronger than he thought. Perhaps he would even come to see her as his equal, though she knew that was a long shot.
Images of the professor returned to her mind, the sheen of his black hair, the well-defined lines of his cheekbones. She forcefully pushed these thoughts away, though she couldn’t deny that seeing his handsome face would be nice, no matter how bitter and reserved he was.
With a deep sigh she said, “I’m still not sure though.” She looked sheepishly at Seth, feeling bad about changing her mind on him. “If you came he might see me as intimidated by him enough to bring someone for support.”
Annaleah took the straw wrapper and began to fold it as she spoke. “I am intimidated, but I don’t want him to know that I am. I want to try to find a place of respect from him, and I’m not sure he would respect me as much if I took you with me.”
She gave him a look of regret. “As much as I would love for you to come with me, I think I need to go by myself.”
Seth tilted his head and smiled at her, and she knew he understood. She let out a deep sigh of relief, and a feeling of warmth towards him washed over her. For a moment she let gratitude warm her heart, thankful that she had such a good person for a best friend.
“No worries though. I'll let you know how it goes."
"Please do. If he is mean to you, I might just have to rough him up," He said, his eyes sparkling merrily.
"My hero," Annaleah said, batting her eyelashes at him playfully. "Actually, I think I'll go see him right now."
Seth looked genuinely surprised. "Wow. Right this very minute? Shouldn't you at least eat your lunch first?"
“I’m sorry Seth. I know it’s rude of me to leave you to eat alone, do you mind?
“Nah, you know me,” he said, “I’m good. Sometimes it’s peaceful to eat alone, to be left to delve into one’s own thoughts.” He reached over and patted her hand reassuringly. “Besides, I know how important this is to you. I’m serious about roughing him up though.”
Annaleah rose to her feet and kissed Seth on the cheek.
“Thank you, Seth, I’ll make this up to you.”
She took the bill to the counter, and after paying she returned to their booth and placed a few dollars on the table.
"I paid the bill, and that’s the tip.” She flashed him a big smile, still feeling guilty about ditching him. “I feel really bad for leaving you. I hate to ask this of you, but can you bring my food to my house for me later? I think I’d look weird bringing a doggy bag to the meeting. I'm also afraid that if I don't do this now, I won't ever do it.”
“Not a problem.” He replied, flashing her a winning smile. “Thanks for paying the bill sweetie.” He said, beaming at her as if he was proud of her strength.
“You’re very welcome. See you later, Seth."
"See you later, Saint Annaleah," Seth said teasingly.
Annaleah's heartbeat quickened as she left the diner. Was she really going to do this? What if he was busy and she interrupted him? Would he dislike her even more? How was she even going to find him?
As Annaleah continued on toward the university, she took a deep breath to steady her nerves. She reminded herself of her credentials how hard she had worked to get where she was now. Uncle John's kind face came to her mind's eye, calming her instantly. He had been her father figure for as long as she could remember. Her real father had left her mother before she was even born, so she had no memory of him at all. Her mother had been killed in a head on collision when she was four. Uncle John had been babysitting her that terrible night, and in a sense, he had never stopped. Though she didn't remember much of her mother, other than a sense of loving her and being deeply loved, she had many of her mother's personal items, which Uncle John had saved for her.
He often told her tales about her mother, which always lifted her heart and made her feel closer to her through Uncles John’s shared memories. He would never talk about her father, though. No matter how hard she pressed, her Uncle's resolve was always the same; refusal. His green eyes would harden behind his wire rim glasses, and his body would stiffen. "I am sorry child, but I will not speak of your father." So she had invented stories for herself; that he was a mobster running from the law, and had to abandon his family in order to assure their safety. Sometimes, he was a traveling poet who had wanderlust in his blood and could not help but answer the call of the road that beat in his heart. Other times, when the sadness sunk in, he was a just a no-good, cruel, hateful man who ran away from his family for no good reason at all. None of these situations, or any of the others she had invented, filled the hole in her heart that her father had left. Sometimes, she would see an older man on the street and wonder, "Is that you? Are you my father?" She had grown used to the fact that she would likely never see the man who’d fathered her. However, there were still times when, seeing an older man with especially green eyes, whose hair was spiral curled and blonde like hers, it would make her wonder if it could be him. She never dared to ask though, too afraid of what the outcome might be. It was easier to do what her father had done so very long ago. To just walk away.
Annaleah was soon walking through the wrought iron gates of the University of Doltree, barely remembering her journey at all, being so consumed as she was by her thoughts. The beauty of the late summer sun illuminated the mid gothic architecture of the University's main admissions building, where Chancellor Tanner had her office. The entire University was beautiful, with its large stained glass windows, turrets, domed doors and marbled pillars. It looked as if it had been built centuries ago in some mythical kingdom, when in reality it had only stood for less than a hundred years. The landscape was gorgeous too, with cherry, pine and oak trees, and all manner of rainbow hue
d flowers planted in between them. It was a peaceful, charming place. She remembered that while growing up in Doltree, when walking or driving by the University with Uncle John, she would imagine what it would be like to be a child living in the college, only in her mind she changed it to a huge medieval castle.
"Annaleah, is that you?" called a voice ahead of her, jolting her out of her thoughts. It was Chancellor Tanner, her brown hair pinned up smartly on her head and her rainbow glasses framing her kind, smiling eyes. "I wasn't expecting to see you here until classes start. Is there anything I can help you with?" Annaleah smiled and quickened her pace to catch up with the Chancellor.
"Actually, yes. I'm lucky I ran in to you. I'm looking for Professor Bainbridge. I could tell he wasn't too happy about having me in his classroom, and I thought it might be a good idea to sit with him before classes start and try to break the ice. Maybe ask him what I can do in his class to help him before I am thrust into it, because the truth is, I am not really sure what to expect."
Chancellor Tanner turned to look at Annaleah, one eyebrow cocked. "Well, you're quite the brave one. I must warn you though; I don't think he’ll be much more receptive at this point, but I do agree it’s a good idea to try to touch base with him as far as teaching goes. You can most likely find him in the teacher's quarters across from the library. I think he might be there now, but if not, check the library. He can be found there a lot of the time as well, in the rare books section. Good luck to you."
"Thank you, Chancellor Tanner. See you Monday," said Annaleah, as she turned towards the teacher's quarters.
"You're most welcome, but do me a favor, Annaleah. Call me Gladys. Chancellor sounds so...stuffy."
"Thank you, Gladys." Annaleah said smiling, glad to be on the chancellor's good side.
"My pleasure. Have fun with Sebastian," she teased, winking at Annaleah before slipping inside the admissions building.